Have you ever tried to break a bad habit? Not easy, is it?
Many of our clients come to us with a bad habit, either personal or organizational, that poses a major barrier to them in achieving the success they desire.
Can you guess what it is?
It’s the habit of negative self-talk.
Maybe you are familiar with it. That little voice inside that says, “I’m not enough,” or “We’ll never meet that goal.” It can become almost automatic, finding its way into your thoughts despite the confident face you put on for the world. It can show up in a general attitude of defeat or pessimism that colors the way people talk about their work.
Self-talk can influence self-esteem, outlook, energy level, performance, and relationships with others – all essential components of success in business and in life.
Many of us are our own biggest naysayers. Internal criticism and self-doubt rings louder in our ears than anything said by anyone else. Our organization focuses external communication on minimizing our shortcomings rather than highlighting our strengths.
In countering negative self-talk, we work with our clients to reframe their thinking and substitute a more positive internal conversation. For example,
- Instead of focusing on problems, look for solutions.
- Rather than viewing things in the extreme – success or failure – look for the middle ground.
- Focus on what you might do, can do, or will do in the future rather than rehashing what you “should’ve, would’ve, could’ve” done today.
- Avoid the comparison monster. Instead keep your eyes on your own goals and standards.
Don’t let your negative self-talk go unchallenged. Consciously counter those self-critical and self-defeating messages with positive affirmations and clear perspective. As a leader, you set the tone and provide the example. Make sure you show your team how to speak themselves into success.
It takes effort. According to Harvard Business Review, it takes an average of five positive messages to counteract or contradict one negative message. The good news is that it IS possible for positive messages to become your habit with sufficient practice.
Just think of the positive momentum you can generate when you get all that negative self-talk out of your head!
I can’t wait to see how successful you will be!
Blessings,
